Take 2

with Jerry & Debbie

Do You “Know Too Much” to Ever Leave the Church?


Living the Christian life is not always easy. Almost everyone has faced moments when you wish you weren’t under the constraints placed upon us by being disciples of Jesus. You look around and see how seemingly “easy” people have it who just do whatever they wish without fear of divine consequences. But any thought of abandoning the faith is quickly done away with because you “know too much.” That is, you are deeply convinced that the Catholic faith is true and no amount of rationalizing could coax you into leaving her safe harbor. This deep “knowledge” of the faith, together with the grace of the Holy Spirit, is a tremendous gift for which those of us who have received it should be eternally grateful.



2 thoughts on “Do You “Know Too Much” to Ever Leave the Church?

  1. Hi. I grew up in the Catholic Church, went to CCD, and received sacraments thru marriage. When I was 17/18 yrs old, I was introduced to non-denominational church and was going to both churches for a year. After I got married, I stopped going to church until my marriage fell apart ( wasn’t a healthy marriage/no kids). In the midst of the divorce, I started seeking out God and trying to live right. It was the lowest part of my life and I was completely broken. I started seeking God and reading the Bible for the first time in my life. I wanted to really know Him and wanted to finally surrender my life and live according to His ways. This led me through a lot of changes, some heartache, and then into a non-denominational church. I attended this church for about two years, and as I was searching…..I was introduced to Messianic Judaism. I attended a Messianic synagogue for 10 years, got re-married, and learned SO much from Judaism. We were living as an Orthodox Jewish family for 7 years, and had four children ( ate kosher, didn’t drive on the Sabbath, wore head covering daily, did Jewish festivals).

    During our time in the MJ movement, we saw so much. We saw between 8-10 families leave their faith in Jesus as the Messiah and convert to Orthodox Judaism. We experienced a lot of hate towards the church, and many people living as their own authority. There was a lot of different views and beliefs. We believed that the church was pagan ( started pagan practices such as Christmas, Easter, and changed the law). This made us really start questioning what we believed. We started seeking in Judaism and the Bible why Jesus is the Messiah and then started studying church history. This was a process..

    We just wanted the truth! As we sought after the early church and what history showed……we were led to the Catholic/Orthodox church…. We have spoke to a few great teachers of the faith ( Steve Ray, Dr. Brant Pitre, Dr. Michael Barber, Roy Shoeman, and Mike Aquilina). We emailed these guys and spoke on the phone with them. With our studying in Judaism, we needed to speak to people who knew Judaism and could help us on the theological level. We listened to a lot of Catholic Answers and EWTN. Because of where we have come from, we desired/desire a more traditional lifestyle.

    It has been an AMAZING journey, but difficult. We just wanted truth and peace. I desired a rest within my soul and a place to raise my family that was true and stable ( I have 4 children under 9 hrs old). We have found the Catholic/Orthodox churches to be true. Historically they hold the apostolic succession and traditions. They hold the authority. Historically, they are the only ones, and we can see this.

    We tried to rule the church out with every thing we could think of……but the truth of the church has always shined through.

    I had to work through many emotional fears/thoughts of the church from what I experienced before I could move further. I went to church growing up, but that was it. I didn’t learn what I need to. I didn’t learn or gain a good understanding of what the church believes and why. I went to church, was an alter server ……. but lived a life on the side of sexual immorality and secular. I saw other people do this…..my family. We never read the Bible together growing up, nor did I ever see my parents read the Bible. My parents allowed my ex to live with us before we were married, and the same with my older brother…. I just didn’t grow up seeing or knowing any families That were serious about God or their faith ( I even had a uncle that was a priest, but got out and got married). This led me to believe that Catholics don’t read the Bible or study. It has taken me a LONG time to believe that this isn’t true. In coming back to the Catholic Church, I have had to work through a lot of humility. I was concerned about my children and them being able to grow up with knowing God, reading the Bible, and seeking to be close with Him. I have had to admit to my parents that I was wrong. When I left the church, I continuously had told them they were wrong and Messianic Judaism was right. I told them that the cross, holidays, praying to Mary were all pagan ideas. I had to take all of those words back.

    Also, in this process I have had to seek an anullment out which has been extremely emotional. After almost 15 years after a divorce, I had to surface a lot of hurtful memories and been waiting for almost a year for the annulment to be approved. We are still waiting and praying it will be approved. It absolutely aches my heart if for some reason it wouldn’t be approved. My ex never wanted kids and we married without our parent’s or anyone’s acknowledgment through the Jp. Then six months later had a Catholic wedding and the. Never when to church.

    My marriage now ( which according to the church is not looked as that) is a sacramental marriage. It was done in the right way of not living together before marriage/ religious ceremony because we both wanted it/ want children/ and trying to live according to the church. So, it’s hard waiting and wondering. I was never taught or understood what exactly was a sacramental marriage. I never knew what the annulment process was or how difficult it would be. I never knew how serious the Catholic Church was about marriage. So all I can hope for now is that God is merciful…..and my annulment will be granted so my family can move forward and grow in the church…..in His truth.

    I LOVE the church now. I am in awe of how God has brought me into a full circle and back. I believe 100% that He allowed me to go the path I went. I learned so much while on that path. I learned discipline, how to seek Him out, how to study the Bible, how to be reverent and devoted to striving to live a life in his ways. I learned about Judaism and can see now how the church has many Jewish aspects and a few traditions to it. I have seen the fruit of what happened when the protestants left the church…..which is a lot of division and wrong interpretations. Sure there are some good things, but bad as well.

    I feel that God had brought me out in order to change my heart, teach me, stabilize me, and then has brought me back to the church. I desire for Catholics to understand their faith and what the church truly teaches. I have hopes of one day being able to help/teach children/people to learn this. I would love for people to see the beauty and fulfillment of the church now while they are in it……and not have to leave.

    There is so much more I could write or talk about, but I know this message is legit my already. I would appreciate any prayer for my annulment and my family that you could provide. Thank you so much for the ministry that you provide! I am sure it is helping many people.

    Many blessings, Kim


  2. I was writing a poem based on your topic. The first two lines are: “I knew too little, now much too much…” I’m a cradle-Protestant in transition. Two years ago, I could not have imagined where my decades-late “yes” to the Lord would go — rapidly. His mercy for decades, had placed many steps along the way as I wandered, taking my family, through various Christian churches. I knew God’s will, but lived in convenient culture’s ways. In many consequential hardships, Jesus was there for me as I cried the psalms. I didn’t often listen, but when I finally did — Whoosh! He stirred in me a desire for More of Him. I soon studied in a Reformed seminary where one course of letters and teachings of the Early Church Fathers gripped me. Why hadn’t I known these saints and martyrs before? I fell in love with them all and read more than required. They were filling in the gaps! The Lord Himself taught me with many ‘God-incidences’. I heard the word ‘rebellion’ and it became clearer that it wasn’t just about me. The Catholic Church was not on my radar yet I longed to be in its cathedrals. It was like heaven was there. One day, the Lord led me to Adoration which I knew nothing about. He whispered to me to open a big book beside me. I was amazed. It was the Liturgy of the Hours and it was Scriptures AND the Fathers! I ordered the whole thing in large print. God stripped me of all my biases. Soon I would be meeting the saints as I prayerfully embarked on the 32 week Ignatian spiritual exercises. Each time I doubted, the Lord would show me His joy at this journey. He welcomed me to the family I could know so much more. Then the hardest and most endearing, Mother Mary won my heart of prayer as bead by bead, I grew closer to Jesus and prayers were answered. I pledged consecration on May 13th in St. Louis de Montefort’s True Devotion to Jesus through Mary at Fatima shrine in NY. Now I am falling in love with the Church, the one Church I had noticed was not falling to the culture’s opposition and changing whims. I intend to stay in a Catholic parish, have gone through RCIA, am awaiting a tribunal response, wear the scapular, pray at least a daily Rosary, read from the daily Liturgy and Word Among Us, have been led by the Lord to Novenas for the nation, and have the fullest prayer life I’ve ever had. I am catching up! Thank you, for your program and EWTN for the big part in the incredible timing to encourage my road as truly towards the fullest.


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